Holy Moses, I have been removed...

...I have seen the spectre he has been here too. Distant cousin from down the line, brand of people who ain't my kind. Holy Moses, I have been removed...

Blah. I skimmed past a few things in yesterday's blog. I always forget something.

So, today was feh. Im tired- it was boring and then shitty and now I'm finished with the day. On the plus, Bobby came over. I was feeling too bitchy to enjoy it. It is what it is. I have way too much crap on my mind anymore. I need to change some things. I feel trapped. I worry that things will never change.

Then it gets over whelming, then I just shut down and refuse to think about anything. At least until bed time when I'm stuck thinking about it.

I need to work on not getting so damn irritated. I need some time to myself alone sometimes. I really wish that people didnt just stop in my room and hover near me just because I have no bedroom door. It bothers me. If I am laying in bed reading, or typing on the computer- don't I deserve to be left alone? I'm never alone. And Im not talking about Carly either- because she's my baby. If she stops to talk to me or needs me or is in my room, that doesnt bother me.

Wah, wah, wah... I'll shuddup. I have to go to my grandparents tomorrow to help my brother trim hedges and bag up the branches. Because apparently my assistance is needed in everything. I am so exhausted of everything it's unbelievable. I want to break free. Dammit.

I am hoping that I can get to the gym tomorrow.

High Points!
- Carly
- Bobby
- Bobby's visit
- Getting things done at work
- Dinner. I enjoyed it
- Elvis Costello
- OH! Alex coming into work on Thursday of last week :)
- Seeing Fresh last week and today as well

So, I think Ive mentioned that I recently noticed how sensitive I actually am. Thats a lie- Ive always been real sensitive and Ive been aware of it for a very long time. Anyway- I just try not to let it get to me. But it's all been really getting to me alot lately. Somebody at work told me today that I am completely clueless. When I said that I wasnt- her reply was a snort and an 'yeah right' sounding "Please!".

You all know me. I am alot of things. Clueless or an airhead I never thought. It really hurt my feelings.

I hate letting shit get to me.

Song for the evening-



And I'm done for the day.

...Holy Moses, I have been deceived. Now the wind has changed direction and I'll have to leave. Won't you please excuse my frankness but it's not my cup of tea. Holy Moses, I have been deceived...